What happens when you set a Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal (BHAG – much more accurate description than a “stretch” goal – always hated that term…) for yourself and you don’t… quite… make… it? Close, but just not quite the entire distance? Where do you focus? On the distance covered, or on the distance remaining?
At the beginning of this year, I committed to walking with two high school friends in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. “Sure,” I said, “What it is it, 10K?” Nope. It’s 39.3 miles in one weekend, a marathon (26.2 miles) on Saturday and a half-marathon (13.1 miles) on Sunday. What did I get myself into??
For someone who has fallen down as many times as I have, this was truly a BIG, HAIRY, AUDACIOUS GOAL – a BHAG to top all BHAGs. The only way I could hope to succeed was to train hard and take it more seriously than I ever had. So I did. My first two-mile walk back in January had me flat on the floor, on the phone to my teammate expressing my doubts about the wisdom of this forty-something klutz taking on this challenge.
What did I do to improve my chances of success?
• I walked. A lot. Over 300 miles between January and June. I practiced the skills I needed to get to the finish line.
• I tracked my progress. We found a great website that tracked where we walked, how fast we walked, and how many calories we burned (always a great incentive!) I also had a hard copy of my log on the fridge, and saw it multiple times each day. Seeing those weekly totals climb was inspiring.
• I talked to my teammates often; we commiserated about turned ankles and sore feet and encouraged each other to get out there and walk again tomorrow.
• We competed a little bit within our team – who had done their first 6-mile walk, who had completed their first 10-mile walk, etc.
• I got help from experts for areas way outside my expertise. I worked with a physical therapist to learn how to take care of my flat feet.
• I talked about the event and my participation. The fund raising requirement made this necessary, but it also helped to keep me accountable in my training.
What was the end result of all this preparation?
• A great long weekend with old friends that never would have happened if we hadn’t taken on this challenge. Renewed friendships with women who knew me when we were just girls, getting ready to take on the world. We’re not as smooth and shiny as we were then, but we are so much stronger and wiser than we were then – and we understand what it means to support each other in ways we never would have grasped in high school.
• Strong legs. Seriously, my legs are in the best shape since 1991. I wish a few other body parts were as strong and toned, but I’ll be working on them next…
• Fund raising for a cause – I raised $2,350 towards breast cancer care and research, and the total group of walkers and crew for the event raised over $5.5 million. Each of us on our team far exceeded the minimum fund raising requirement and earned “Fantastic Fundraiser” hats to wear on the walk.
• A deep understanding of what I as an individual and we as a team were able to accomplish with a lot of preparation and hard work, which was far beyond what I expected at the beginning.
So did my team finish all 39.3 miles?
Sort of. I had intermittent trouble throughout my training with my feet; I knew I was pushing it to attempt walking these distances. It was clear to me on Saturday that if I tried to push through and finish the route I would not only hold up my team, I would also not be able to walk on Sunday. So I made the incredibly difficult choice to take the bus from the half-way point on Saturday and leave my teammates to finish the day without me. They finished successfully, but the route was very demanding and ended with five miles of steep San Francisco hills – there was no way could I have finished that route, when I was already struggling at mile 13.
I didn’t feel like a failure, because I knew what I already had done to get to that point, and that I was making the right choice… but I did feel pretty empty as I sat on that bus. It was so hard to watch my friends head out and know that I couldn’t do it with them. I kept up with them through the rest of the day through text messages and cell phone pictures, and at my friend’s request ordered pizza and beer that would arrive after she made it back to the hotel. I had a couple of hours to recover, so I was able to take care of her that evening, which felt good.
We set out Sun
day morning with everyone feeling energized, but also sore, tired, and a little beat-up from the demands of Saturday’s route. The volunteers cheered us on and then took care of us throughout the day. My teammate struggled – her knee was aching and her blisters developed blisters. At the rest stops I was able to fill her water bottle or pick up her lunch while she was at the medical tent getting her feet taken care of and her knee wrapped and iced. It was definitely a team effort, but together we crossed the finish line.
So when you aim for but don’t quite hit the mark on a Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal you still end up making progress. Maybe not as much as you hoped, but still progress, and this is good.
What about those smaller, everyday kind of goals & commitments?
What about when you don’t hit the every day goals? I’ve been struggling lately with these smaller commitments & goals – sometimes as small as a phone call to a friend, sometimes as big as a commitment to my team to finish a piece of work by a certain date or time. What happens then? I let my team down, I feel frustrated and like a failure, the list of things to do gets longer… Progress is slowed or stalled. So my new Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal is to figure out how to get out of my rut of procrastination and avoidance.
What am I doing to improve my chances of success?
• Fessing up and asking my teammates to help me stay on track.
• Going back to the basics – something that helped me tremendously a number of years ago was David Allen’s book “Getting Things Done.” So I’m re-reading it and his new book, “Making It All Work.”
• Practicing the skills I need to get to the finish line. While I am re-learning Allen’s incredibly effective method, I’ve gone old school. I make a list each day. I have a big, fat black marker to cross off items that I’ve finished. Anything unfinished goes at the top of the next day’s list in red. A list that has every item completed goes on the fridge to remind me of my success.
• Reminding myself that most of the things on my list are not things that I dislike, or that someone else has imposed on me – it is my choice to stay engaged with my family & friends and to work with a great team to build a new business.
• Really thinking about the consequences of not getting the things on the list done – not just the immediate gratification of not getting off the couch, but the longer impact on my life and this wonderful new adventure we’re on with ICO.
How well is it working? Well, writing this blog entry has been at the top of the list for a week, and it sure feels good to cross it off with my big black marker! I’ll let you know in a couple of weeks if I’m making the kind of progress I’m aiming for, or if I’m still stuck in that rut.
